Home > Stories From Small Town > The Cat Scat (Poop) Disappointment

The Cat Scat (Poop) Disappointment

Last week my friend Melissa stopped by Small Town for a visit. I wrote about her in an old Blogher post “Murderous Rendezvous.” We met on Twitter and then planned our first in person meeting after I attended an autopsy in Tucson. Melissa lives in a small desert town and our lunch took place in the middle of nowhere. We broke all the online safety rules and lived to tell the tale. No, I’m not endorsing this kind of behavior.

We began the first day of her visit with a hike through my mother’s canyon. I’ve now christened it Canyon D’mum. We went in search of mom’s mountain lion to shoot. NO, not that kind of shoot.

Melissa Crytzer Fry is an awesome photographer and writer. She publishes the blog What I Saw. I am in constant awe of her talent and the inspiration she gives fellow writers.

During our search we found large cat poop droppings in the sand (scat). We’ve since discovered our feline was most likely a bobcat. Though we never caught a glimpse of our large predator the two discovered piles got us quite excited. We’ve also decided on another adventure, an overnight camp out to finish our explorations. Here kitty-kitty.

We left and drove the ten plus miles of winding dirt roads to get back to the un-civilization of Small Town. My husband was waiting to entice us with barbeque ribs and chicken. I hit the blender and whipped up my special Mango Margaritas. As you can see by the picture, the alcohol was a success but I don’t really remember the dinner.

What’s that hanging down the front of my hat? I thought you might ask. I’m hoping it isn’t underwear on my head but I wouldn’t be surprised if it were.

To end our wonderful day we headed to the hot tub to soak our hiking legs. We gazed at the blurry stars and talked and talked and talked. It was quite late when we pulled our shriveled bodies out and went to bed. Melissa says I bumped the walls to stay upright but regardless of my small shoulder bruise I think she was hallucinating.

 

My alarm went off at 5:30 am and I hit the shower followed by my sleepy-eyed friend. We got dressed, me in uniform, and were ready for our exciting day of patrol. With our current officer shortage I’m doing double duty of patrol and detective work. I’m alone on my shift each Sunday and this was the day Melissa was with me.

Within a short time I received a call from Dispatch saying a distraught woman was trying to reach me. I took the phone call and between her tears I was given a vague idea of her general location and we went in search. I brought her back to the police department and listened to her heart wrenching domestic story. Unfortunately, I’m not able to give specific details but Melissa was in tears and I was holding mine for my bedtime crying jag that happens in these situations. We were able to put a temporary band aide on her circumstances and the following day I came up with a more permanent solution.

My shift progressed. I was yelled at by an old man for not doing my job (his thoughts) and also performed a hearing so a young lady could get her car out of impound. I drove Melissa through every inch of Small Town including drug alley and pee pee lane. Yes, they mean exactly what they sound like.

I took her inside an old abandon two-story building and we searched the premises. Creepy but just what was needed to get our blood pumping. There was garbage, manic writing on the walls, broken window glass and an overall ick factor. It was fun to say the least.

I gave Melissa the in-depth story of my serial killer case (one day a book) and showed her the locations involved in my exciting homicide career. I pulled my squad car over to say hello to a man walking down the street. I arrested his wife a few weeks before and wanted to check on the current situation. He stuck his head in Melissa’s side of the car window and whispered a drug tip.

I think overall Melissa received an excellent education about my life as a cop and it was wonderful to share more than my written stories. If you ever doubt the validity of my police life please check in with Melissa via her blog and she will straighten you out. Like she said, “You couldn’t make this shit up.”

The visit was a success and we are closer friends for the combined fun and excitement. She had a fascination with my 150 pound dog Charlie and though Melissa was a bit apprehensive at first they became licking cousins by the time her visit ended. The picture is Charlie playing with her favorite toy an empty five gallon bucket.

I can’t wait to do this all again and continue our adventure. For the other side of our weekend exploits, please visit What I Saw.

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  1. May 2, 2012 at 9:30 am

    Another wonderful blog. This is my favourite – I love it. Suzy is a genuis with words AND she has so much to write about. Her husband must be a pretty special guy too; not every man could keep up with such a woman!

    • May 2, 2012 at 9:50 am

      You hit the nail on the head with my husband. There is no one else on earth that could put up with me.

  2. May 2, 2012 at 9:59 am

    The word pie-eyed comes to mind! It sounds like you two had an awesome time!! Mango margaritas — delicious!! Will now go get Melissa’s side of the story!

  3. driversuz
    May 2, 2012 at 10:25 am

    Every time I read your blog, I wind up wearing a goofy smile. You make everything better!

    • May 2, 2012 at 1:06 pm

      That was an awesome thing to say and it made me have a goofy smile, thank you!!

  4. May 2, 2012 at 10:29 am

    I loved this! It was so much fun to read it from Melissa’s, then your point of view!! And I love the photo of the two of you — priceless!! 🙂

    • May 2, 2012 at 1:09 pm

      Yes, the picture of Melissa and me is priceless. We were feeling no pain and it’s right before we made our way to the hot tub. You have no idea how I’ve missed her. We get very little company up here and it was such a pleasant change and barrels of laughs. You really should consider coming with us on our camp out!

  5. May 2, 2012 at 10:38 am

    OMG, I don’t know if it’s because I was once a dispatcher or what, but your blog posts make me laugh out loud. Peepee lane indeed! I’ve downloaded your book and will have the time to read it one of these days…until then, I’ll be content to get my daily chuckles here. Thank you!

    • May 2, 2012 at 1:17 pm

      Thank you Ann. I love my dispatchers and it’s my daily goal to make them laugh on the radio and not be so uptight. I radioed in the other day, “I’m stopping at the corner of 12th and Main. There are two dogs mating on the side of the road and there may be complications.” The poor dispatcher could not get her reply past her laughter. The dogs were mating but I made up the “complications” part. I will also flub them with things like, “There’s a derelict doing ditsy doodles down Dabson Ln.” Oh the fun of my job. They love me too 🙂

  6. May 2, 2012 at 1:18 pm

    As you had suggested, Suzie, I went and read Melissa’s post, and it sure was a fun read! I am sitting here feeling jealous that you two ladies were able to enjoy each others company with (who knows how many!) glasses of Mango Margaritas. Yay! So I read this and pretended I, too, was there ~ a third wheel. lol!

    I also see, by reading your post, that you and I have most excellent husbands. I like knowing that your hubby is a wonderful supporter of your life choices. Just awesome!! 🙂

    Much love and big virtual hugs, Amiga,
    ~Virginia

    • May 2, 2012 at 1:49 pm

      There is no one else on this planet who could put up with me but my man. He was a little beat up after having two Suzie’s around but he persevered. He cooks a wicked BBQ. I think the Mango Margarita were toooo good 🙂

  7. crytzerfry
    May 4, 2012 at 10:27 am

    Oh woman, how I LOVED spending this time with you (and miss you as well). And I have to give the hubby props for his great attitude. At one point he said (proudly, I might add) of you: “Yep. She’s always been independent. Wouldn’t have it any other way.” Thank God I married of man of similar ilk.

    And I’m laughing my butt off at the alliteration you used when calling in to dispatch. Dipsy doodles down Dabson Lane. Wicked funny. And yes, your poor man to have to endure TWO Suzies at once. I am still looking fondly on that visit. What a highlight of my spring! You are incredible woman. Simply incredible!

    • May 4, 2012 at 10:33 am

      The same can be said for you. Lion hunting with me, hunting the streets without a gun when I had one. You’re just as crazy as me. Simply the best!

  8. May 4, 2012 at 11:23 am

    Thanks for bringing us along on the tour! Small town or big town, it is always fascinating to see the lay of the land from someone as intimately involved in every corner as you are.

    • May 4, 2012 at 11:35 am

      Thank you for stopping by Robert.

  9. May 7, 2012 at 7:55 pm

    Your style is so inclusive. Thanks for allowing the honor of tagging along. Always a great read. 🙂 A double shift? Do you ever take the dog on patrol for company?

    • May 8, 2012 at 6:36 am

      I could probably get away with taking Charlie a time or two but if I left her in the car to handle something she would cry loudly. It would be embarrassing because she’s such a baby. She only looks mean until you see her nub tail and her entire butt wagging.

  10. May 12, 2012 at 2:11 pm

    Good times!

  11. May 12, 2012 at 2:12 pm

    And, you look really pretty in that picture, Suzie. 🙂

    • May 12, 2012 at 2:27 pm

      Nope that’s Melissa the drunker one.

      • May 12, 2012 at 2:30 pm

        Ha! Shut your mouth, I knew exactly which one you were. The very lovely looking sober-ish one.

      • May 12, 2012 at 2:40 pm

        Okay, I should gracefully say thanks here. Thank you!

      • May 12, 2012 at 2:44 pm

        Ahh, I know, it’s hard sometimes to accept the truth about how awesome we are. I know…

  12. May 12, 2012 at 8:42 pm

    So happy to have found my way to your delightful blog tonight – first time reader. I am enormously proud of you for your sacrifice and service to your community, and for making such a brave career move mid-life. I have proudly added your blog to my own ‘blogroll’ as my blog is dedicated to my CMPD boys and girls in blue that I have the privilege and honor of cooking breakfast and dinner for. Every other Saturday, my first alarm goes off at 4:30 am to start cooking breakfast, and I host a dinner the first Tuesday of every month. Truly, an unexpected blessing in my life. Continued success in you writing, and my respect and gratitude for your service.

    • May 13, 2012 at 7:14 am

      Annie, I love your blog. What an incredible and wonderful thing you do. I wish we had you here. The guys and gals at CMPD are so fortunate to have you. I will add you to my blogroll too. {Hugs} sweet lady.

  13. May 13, 2012 at 2:12 pm

    Thank you for your kind comments … you made my day too! I love these officers. I can’t hardly talk about them without welling up. They have filled an empty place in my heart that I can’t even explain. We need to find you an AHOP person where you live. I could promise them, with 100% certainty, that they will love it!!

  14. May 13, 2012 at 2:18 pm

    Thank you for your kind comments …. you made my day too! So happy to have found your blog. I look forward to following your adventures. Be safe!!

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